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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27694642">glutamate</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeonpathy/pseuds/aeonpathy'>aeonpathy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>put the sun in my hands [14]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band), WAYV</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Drabble, Established Relationship, Flirting, M/M, Mild Language, Neurology &amp; Neuroscience, POV Second Person, Studying</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 03:01:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,827</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27694642</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeonpathy/pseuds/aeonpathy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What are some neurodegenerative diseases? You can only remember CTE right now. Are you about to have an aneurysm because Donghyuck’s hand is guiding yours under his shirt? No, you’re being dramatic.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>put the sun in my hands [14]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1128143</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>51</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>glutamate</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hi this is an inverted first person 2nd pov fic, not a y/n</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p> </p><p>If you’ve lived in a time and place where a shooting star could grant you a wish, you’d be finding yourself at the university library on a cold ass, rainy day. The dim lights in the library give off a cozy ambiance and you bet your ass you’re studying for your Human Brain and Disease class. </p><p> </p><p>No study guide to go off of and your notes are smudged. Your hot chocolate steams in your Hydroflask and you desperately want to draw a big, red line through the notes. What the fuck is a sodium-potassium pump? Did you remember where lower motor neurons are located? No. You begin to wonder if you’ll pass this quiz.</p><p> </p><p>Coming up to your table is Lee Jeno, some guy with a pretty smile and whose heart is too good. The rest of your friends would say that Jeno’s gonna be the one to get married first and have kids, but the way he sits down across from you and drops all of his textbooks in a messy pile says otherwise. The slump of his shoulders are there, and the dark eye bags aren’t hidden, even in this lighting. He asks, “Did you even sleep last night?” You raise an eyebrow at him, and he shrugs. You know Jeno stayed up last night with you to geek out about some PC specs.</p><p> </p><p>The rest of the library is packed. Midterms are here and that’s how you know everyone’s got it rough. It’s noisy, but as loud as a library can get. Compared to the stadium during a home game, the library is a small fraction of that. Make it 1/100. Maybe 1/50. You don’t wanna be too dramatic. </p><p> </p><p>You stare at your handwriting a bit more, flip through the crinkled pages, wrap the blanket your mother knitted for you a little tighter around your body. The warmth and comfiness of your bed is calling. <em> Hello, </em> it rings, <em> come back to me, I know you want to. </em>Jeno sneezes, and you push a pack of tissues his way. Cool.</p><p> </p><p>If you’re one of the students living in the dorms with the communal pool, you share that dorm with two other guys. Jaemin and Hendery like to make fun of the Justin Bieber poster on your wall. All your friends do. It’s what happens when you keep a poster of him on your wall.</p><p> </p><p>Jaemin sits down next to Jeno. “Jeno, dude, did you see that video?” And Jeno goes, “What video? The one from yesterday?” but you have no idea what the hell they’re talking about, so you keep blankly staring at your notes. They start to look like a foreign language. </p><p> </p><p>The phone lights up and your lockscreen stares back at you. Lucas texted you. He’s one of your best friends, but he likes to say he’s THE best friend. You’ve gone through many events with him, like that one time he drunkenly asked to fuck you at some fraternity party freshman year or the other time he cried when you gifted him an elephant charm because it reminded him of home. </p><p> </p><p>“Yo,” Jaemin says, “Why are you dressed like a thirst trap?” You ignore him, until you realize he’s talking about you. Well. You look down and stare at your outfit. There’s no appeal in grey sweats and an oversized graphic tee. It’s basic. Every person dresses like this. Your glasses sit low on the bridge of your nose and your hair sits damp on your head. The brown corduroy jacket someone got you for Christmas hangs on the chair.</p><p> </p><p>Jeno flicks Jaemin’s forehead. “He’s sexy, it’s why he keeps getting hit on.” You despise that statement but keep silent. </p><p> </p><p>You don’t even know why Jaemin’s here. He doesn’t have the same class as you and Jeno. But he’s good company. The boys cling onto Jaemin because he’s the mom friend of the group, and that’s the second best thing from your actual mom. Scratch that. He’s basically your parents. A 2-in-1 combo. Scratch that again. He’s on his way to becoming a parent.</p><p> </p><p>He hands you a warm, chewy gooey chocolate cookie and your stomach grumbles in agreement. Wow, you didn’t even know you were hungry. That’s pretty crazy.</p><p> </p><p>Your best friend’s boyfriend shows up. You understand why Jaemin’s here now.</p><p> </p><p>Renjun’s a sneaky, sly fox. Didn’t even hear that man coming. He sits on your left. Renjun’s the guy most people are intimidated by because he’s a part of the famed ‘big brain’ students on campus. You’ve seen his transcript before. He took 18 credits last quarter and passed his classes with good fuckin’ grades. Renjun takes one look at where you left off on and smiles. “You get cerebrospinal fluid below L2, cauda equina, in the subarachnoid space.”</p><p> </p><p>Of course he knows. Renjun took this class his freshman year because he’s that motivated. But he distracts you from your work. He teaches you how to fold origami hearts and cranes. It’s his new hobby. You look at your paper heart and one of the sides is lopsided, but you still find it okay since it was your first try. Renjun says that’s all part of the charm.</p><p> </p><p>The table you’re sitting at is big. Might as well serve as a cafeteria table with how big it is. There’s still lots of seats at the table, eight chairs empty, and yet when students keep piling in, no one sits. Students like socializing. It’s what the university prides itself on; everyone’s pretty friendly. </p><p> </p><p>Renjun teaches Jeno and Jaemin how to fold paper boxes. You fold the corners of your notes because you’re tired of studying. Staring at the same pages for two hours straight does you no good, you conclude. You people watch instead. The hot chocolate is still hot, and you grimace in pain when it scalds your tongue.</p><p> </p><p>Real smart of you.</p><p> </p><p>Chenle appears, wrapped up snugly in a scarf and thick coat. His nose is red. Chenle’s a wild card, because every time you call him he’s always free, but when you look at his schedule, you see no freedom. This schedule is packed Monday-Friday, and he should be married to it. Ring and everything. Yet he’s always down to do something at any time. Which is why he sits the next seat over from Renjun and hauls his backpack on the table with a hearty thump. You wish you could have magical time management powers like that.</p><p> </p><p>No one’s studying right now, not when the boys are all arriving one by one. Jeno talks about the weather and how his eyesight’s like seeing the world through a sifter. Chenle says that simile makes no sense. You laugh because at least you think it’s funny. Chenle digs a notebook out of his bag. He’s studying humanities through Global Comics because it’s an easy and fun class. Comics are fun. You keep a few on a shelf in your room. </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin rambles on about how you look like you’re trying to get fucked or something, and Renjun replies with, “If you really think he looks that good, just fucking kiss him already.”</p><p> </p><p>Jaemin waggles his eyebrows indecently and leans over the table, lips puckered up. Chenle stares at the two of you in disgust. You throw a paper crane at Jaemin’s face and Jaemin laughs. Some people in the area look over in curiosity before turning back to their conversations. It’s all good.</p><p> </p><p>Jisung and Hendery bound over to the table a few minutes later. Hendery’s someone who takes everyone’s feelings into consideration. He’s lovely, and everyone agrees. Once in the university polls, he was voted the kindest person on campus. But when you’re someone who shares a dorm with him, you see Hendery sneak pets into the dorm and you turn a blind eye to the big safe of cash buried under a pile of clothes in his closet. What’s he up to? Drug dealing? Rich family? Sugar daddy? Jaemin thinks the latter.</p><p> </p><p>Jisung ruffles Chenle’s hair and takes a seat beside him. They’re two peas in a pod, really. When Chenle wraps his scarf around Jisung’s neck and giggles, you only smile and look away. The boys do the same. That’s for everyone to adore, but not to watch. Those two have always had something special.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey, lemme see your thermos.” Hendery takes it even though you haven’t said a damn word, wincing when the liquid burns his tongue, too. Karma? Not really. He’s too nice to have anything bad happen to him. After giving you your hot chocolate back, he skips the right chair and instead sits next to it. He winks at you.</p><p> </p><p>Yangyang pops out from the history textbook aisle. He’s holding a textbook for his humanities class, Witches: Myth and Reality. You’re thinking about taking that class next quarter because it sounds awesome and the professor is cool. It’s also an easy general education requirement, so you’re dead set on getting into that class. It might explain a few things in your life. Answers are what you need. </p><p> </p><p>You listen to Yangyang. “Guys, I just saw the weirdest shit on the quad on my way here.” What happened in the quad? Everything happens in the quad. Unfortunately. You’ve seen too much shit happen there.</p><p> </p><p>If you’re the guy who sits with these losers every Friday, you’re probably gay. It’s no insult, like, you’re actually gay. Or bisexual. You’re bisexual. Gay people surround themselves with gay friends. It’s the truth. Life feels better when you feel safer.</p><p> </p><p>Enter stage right. Xiaojun sits quietly next to Yangyang. If you were told you’d be befriending Xiaojun five months ago, you’d probably think you were losing it. Xiaojun’s considered the theatre angel, whose acting is so good, no one knows if he’s lying, acting, or telling the truth, which makes him a slippy-slidey fella. You have no idea how you two became friends—it just happened out of the blue. You’re not about to question it, though. More friends the merrier, as they say. You don’t know who ‘they’ is, but are you gonna question that too?</p><p> </p><p>No. There’s three empty seats, the one on your right, one next to Renjun, one next to Jaemin. The boys are almost all here. You should probably get back to studying your notes. Renjun, a gift from the heavens, helps you because he aced that class with a solid A. “Yeah, without dopamine, the indirect pathway becomes hyperactive. Does that make sense?”</p><p> </p><p>Again, no, it really doesn’t, so you nod your head without understanding. Are you gonna pass this quiz? Actually, are you gonna pass the class? Your grade sits at a 75%, but that’s a solid B. Not shabby, not bad at all. </p><p> </p><p>Xiaojun hands everyone a donut, and Hendery steals your hot chocolate once again. You try to take it back. All the hot chocolate’s gone already, and the Hydroflask is starting to get cold. One of your stickers is peeling off, and the edge of the sticker is brown with dust and lint. Yuck.</p><p> </p><p>You hear the man before you see him. It’s just something that Lucas does, the party travels with him. Quite literally sometimes, too. You’re kinda an introvert, and yet you still get dragged along. </p><p> </p><p>“Sup, bro,” Lucas greets, gripping your hand and patting your back. You try not to make a face because he has big hands and big hands hurt in more ways than you can count. He’s also on the American Football team, but so are you, so in all honesty, it feels good on your back. You need a massage or something. </p><p> </p><p>“Hey Xuxi,” Renjun says. There’s a twinkle in his eye. You know that look all too well. Couples, man, always gotta make you feel lonely and shit. Even when you’re not a single pringle and when they try to include you to make you feel like you’re not third wheeling, it ends up happening anyways.</p><p> </p><p>The notes in front of you are forgotten. The blanket your mother so lovingly knit for you gets placed on the empty seat to your right. Your tattoos peek out of the sleeves and say hi. <em> Hey, </em> they say, <em> woah, there’s light. That’s crazy. </em>Jeno whistles, and Jaemin stares at your arms. You know what he’s gonna say.</p><p> </p><p>“See? Thirst trap,” Jaemin complains, and Jeno whacks his stomach. “Ow, pretty boy, what was that for?”</p><p> </p><p>Jisung fake heaves and Xiaojun looks uncomfortable, but is that acting, or his actual face? You can’t tell. Acting? Not your thing. If you were to put Scarlett Johansson next to an egg, you’d say the movie was Ghost in the Shell. They’re also both white. You’re going off topic here. Wait, but eggs can be different colo—</p><p> </p><p>Anyways. Eggs have nothing to do with acting. Unless you’re an egg prop in some play. Has Xiaojun played the role of an egg before? You’re curious, and remind yourself to ask him some other time.</p><p> </p><p>Why are you still thinking about eggs?</p><p> </p><p>If you were fifteen a couple years ago, chances are the boy that sits in the empty seat to your right annoyed the absolute hell out of you. The boys make inappropriate gestures when you lean over and kiss the boy that annoyed you all those years ago smack dab on the lips. They start making crude noises when the kiss gets deepened. Donghyuck has always been greedy.</p><p> </p><p>You give that lopsided origami heart to him. He grins at you and keeps it safe in his pocket. Donghyuck’s good at that, making sure everything he does gets your heart fluttering like some fucking shy kid in grade school who gets nervous every time they interact with their crush. Not that you’re speaking from experience or whatever. That’s funny. Haha. Ahaha. Um.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey baby!” he grins. You’re staring. You notice that you tend to stare at Donghyuck a lot. You wrap your blanket around your boyfriend. He drapes the blanket over the both of you, because he actually has a functioning brain at the moment and the blanket, you soon realize, is big enough to fit at least three grown people. </p><p> </p><p>So. You’re here for a study session. You try to review your notes, Renjun’s folding a jar full of paper hearts while he quietly sings Tori Kelly to himself, Lucas snaps cameos of him, Jeno goes over the notes with you, Hendery is playing Genshin Impact on his phone. Jisung’s studying for his class called Flower Power, and you haven’t got a clue on what the class is about, but it’s probably biology or botany. Chenle’s whisper-shouting at Xiaojun across the table about a new fusion hotpot restaurant that opened downtown, Jaemin’s doodling on a paper box, and Yangyang’s telling you about witches being the product of mass hysteria, all while Donghyuck’s whispering filthy things in your ears.</p><p> </p><p>Donghyuck’s not a product of mass hysteria, but he’s definitely a witch because he’s somehow convinced you to do dirty, lewd things you would usually never find yourself doing. “I’ve been thinking about you all day,” he purrs into your ear. Your nails dig deeper into his thigh. He smiles up at you. What are some neurodegenerative diseases? You can only remember CTE right now. Are you about to have an aneurysm because Donghyuck’s hand is guiding yours under his shirt? No, you’re being dramatic. </p><p> </p><p>His other hand traces your tattoos. Up and down, side-to-side, his finger tantalizingly caresses your bicep, down to your forearm, wrist, and back up to your shoulder, where another tattoo hides. You try not to shiver. The hand you have on him circles around to his back and it’s his turn, mouth falling partly open as you scratch down his lower back. His eyes glaze over.</p><p> </p><p>Ahem. You bring your hand back to your notes and pretend it didn’t happen. You smile to yourself because it’s funny. No one needs to know the other reasons you’re smiling down at your notes.</p><p> </p><p>Right. Eventually, everyone settles down and actually begins to work on what they have to do. A jar of paper hearts sits in the middle of the table. Renjun and Jeno help you figure out where lower motor neurons are located. They’re in the ventral horn of the spinal cord. That’s pretty nifty or whatever. Human anatomy is kinda wild. You still have no clue how neurons work, but that’s a concept for another day.</p><p> </p><p>Life to you is chill like this. You like where you are right now. The boys decide that yes, everyone’s going to that new restaurant, and Hendery’s got the bill. You still think the money he’s got is from someone’s will. Or maybe he’s actually rich. That’s right. You’re friends with mysterious people who operate in ways you don’t understand. That’s okay though. You don’t need the answers to those right now.</p><p> </p><p>Holding Donghyuck’s hand as you follow everyone out of the library is good enough.</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>fun fact my beta read this to me while she was on a caffeine high</p><p> </p><p>  <a href="https://twitter.com/laoxaichay">twitter</a><br/><a href="https://curiouscat.me/laoxaichay">cc</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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